Reinvention isn’t just a resume update. It’s a nervous-system upgrade. In this powerful conversation, coach and former Estée Lauder innovation leader Kelle Jacob shares her Embodiment Method-a three-part framework to reinvent your career from the inside out.Self regulation must be a major part of any ReInventors repertoire because when we are in fight-or-flight we don’t make smart decisions. In this episode you’ll gain access to a method for nervous system regulation so you can ‘tone it down’ and move forward with confidence.Kelle unpacks how a public failure on America’s Next Top Model became a catalyst, how to handle the “upper limit” when good things start happening, and why corporate success and personal purpose can absolutely coexist.
In this episode you’ll learn:
- How to rewire beliefs in a theta state so new possibilities actually stick
- Practical breathwork to expand capacity and reduce fear in uncertain times
- A simple test for when to push vs. pause during reinvention
- Why “it all works out in the end” is a strategy, not a cliché
Perfect for anyone leaving corporate, launching a side hustle, or seeking clarity, resilience, and real momentum.
**Subscribe to our ReInvention Podcast and stay on the cutting-edge with fresh ideas and practical tools to navigate the future of your work!
Episode Transcript
Kelle: rewire and to fully embody at a deep subconscious level, the new identities, the new beliefs, the new possibilities that you wanna hold that are more congruent with where you’re going. So that’s the first part All right. So happy to be here with my dear friend Kelle Jacob, who’s somebody that I’ve worked with, and she’s an amazing coach, and also a professional reinventor, right? Chris that’s why we wanted to bring people on that are coaches, but have also been through the reinvention process like yourself. And I’m just super stoked to get this conversation going.
Me too. And I’m so excited to be here. Thank you for having me guys.
Todd: Yeah. Welcome into the conversation. So we wanna get to some of the good stuff because you’re also out there in the market helping a lot of people make transitions professionally, and you do it in a very unique way.
I know your work is really deep, it’s very nervous system oriented. And I want to dive into some of that. ’cause I think that’s really gonna help a lot of people that are just dealing with the very, topical, external stuff, but it’s really like an internal thing, reinvention. And that’s the juice we want to get to with you.
But before we do, I wanna talk a little bit about your history. You started off in fashion, you were a model, you were on America’s top model. Like, then you went into Estee Lauder, I believe. Tell me a little bit about your history and then how you got here now.
Kelle: Yeah. You know, as I think about the levels and the many iterations I’ve had in my life, and how many times I transitioned, how many times I transitioned into spaces that didn’t even exist at the time. And I think about what was the underpinning of it before I created the embodiment method, which is what I use to help people through their own transitions and reinventions.
Very early on I was a very good student. I did all the right things. I was top of every club, always running for class president. And I remember going, okay, now go to college. And if you asked me when I was 11, would I want it to be, my answer was CFO of a Fortune 100 company, like at 11, I felt like everything was kind of, you will do this, you are going to be this type of person.
And when college came around, I’m like, you know what? That doesn’t feel right. I think I wanna get off this ride and, and really define and figure out what it is I want for myself. And I just started to lean into my passions. And at that time, art was one of my passions and I started working for an art gallery.
And I think that’s the first clue, right? Being able to have the, the bravery to say. Hold on a second, right, to just pause and really kind of what’s going on autopilot and is this really in alignment? And for me it was very easy because my body started shutting down. I didn’t have as much energy, I just wasn’t happy and really paying note to that.
And then being brave enough to say, you know what? I think this isn’t the ride for me. And then also being able to lean into the things that were interesting. Like I didn’t know exactly where the end was, but I knew that this was something that sparked me and following that joy and that path, and I started working for an art gallery, and this was back in 2002, 2003 to date myself. The Kundalini works. It keeps my skin looking fresh now. I started working for this gallery and I noticed they weren’t selling pieces. And I’m like, why don’t you sell this online?
And they’re like, no one’s gonna buy art online. You’re crazy. And again, I’m like, I, I believe this. And I, I trust, and I think that’s another thing which we’ll get into why nervous system regulation is so important, is really having the capacity to trust yourself. I do think this is something and really leaning into it, and I wouldn’t let up about it.
And eventually they said, okay, just do it. Within six months they were making more money online than they were in their physical gallery. And so at that time, I was just comprising their big list and now leading their whole online sales funnel and I’m like, I’m telling you what to buy and I’ve opened a channel for you to sell it.
I’m gonna start my own art gallery. And I like got a book, how to Start a Business for Dummies. Wrote my first business plan, got like a really cute outfit and bought a case and went to Chase Bank you know, for an investment and I asked for $50,000. They’re like, no way. You’re like 12.
I was 18. But they gave me five and it was enough to start, and I started as a gallery owner. So here I went from this, very focused high school student that was going to be like, you know, CFO to an art gallery owner in New York City, an online art gallery owner at that. It was just like when I think having the bravery of like, Hey, this doesn’t really feel in alignment, and then being able to lean into what does, even if it only the first step was clear and continuing to just move forward steadily and, mm-hmm.
I know this now, but one of my superpowers is my nervous system and being able to feel okay and grounded in uncertain times. ‘Cause oftentimes everything works out in the end. It’s just how many of us can really stick through it through those turbulent storms to get to it.
Todd: I wanna stop there for a minute because I wanna just reflect on a couple things that you shared.
You know, you really do have a superpower around this because I think a lot of people that Chris and I are talking to are at that point where it’s like, we know it’s not right. Like the whole, I’ve followed the path laid before me. I checked all the boxes. I’ve had the success. My parents are grandparents are proud if they’re still here, like it looks good, but something is wrong.
There’s something around you. That’s why I wanted to bring you on here. Did you train yourself to get in touch with that feeling and then allow it to drive your behavior? Because this is at the very core, maybe I’m putting the cart before the horse here, but this is at the very core of reinvention is being fearless.
You mentioned the word bravery and courage several times. And I think you’ve had that almost imbued into you for some reason, or you’ve also trained yourself to be that way. I want to continue with your story, but I also wanna dive in because people are out there stressed around AI and industries ending and careers ending and have that feeling coming up really strongly.
And I want to just hone in on what is that quality that you had either naturally or did you train yourself? Let’s dive into that a little bit.
Kelle: Yeah. You know, it’s actually a really good question and quite frankly, it’s the thing that fuels me and it’s not something I share often. Mm-hmm. Of where it came from.
You know, when I was younger, I suffered from major depression, and I remember when I was dealing with it. It’s like, there’s so many things happening in my life and I didn’t have tools and I kept saying, I don’t have the tools. Like serotonin levels, we’ll just give you some antidepressants and balance you out.
And I’m like, yeah, that’s fine, but I still don’t know how to deal, and I didn’t understand And I went on these things and now I, I was on like Wellbutrin and all these things, and now there are studies where they show that a lot of these SSRIs should not be given to children under the age of 18 because
it actually encourages suicidal behavior. And I, I mean, it was a very long and a very hard journey for me. And at the end I was so distraught and I overdosed and I passed out and I, I was gone for three minutes and 17 seconds and I don’t remember, and I obviously I was at the hospital. I woke up several days later.
I don’t remember having, you know, some pearly gates or mm-hmm. You know, talking to God. But I came back with a very different understanding of how the world worked. Mm-hmm. And this understanding and this appreciation that this is the only life that we have. Mm-hmm. And it is my life and it is really up to me to define what that is and if there are circumstances that aren’t in alignment. It is my life and I have everything within my power to change it. Mm. If the circumstances, if the dynamics, if the environment, if the path that I’m on isn’t right, then get off the path because this is the only life you have. This is the main event. And coming out of it, it changed everything.
Nothing seemed impossible and also nothing seemed worth wasting this life. Being that young I was 15 when that happened, being that young and still, you know, under my parents’ care and things like that. There was also this understanding that, I get what you’re saying, but this is my, this is my destiny and this is, I have to define this for myself and whatever I want. Like it can be different. It could be anything because I also saw how awful it could be. And so I think with that is where a lot of that bravery of like I understood what the alternative was, but I also understood how much more power I had in defining what my experience on this world will be.
And I can choose for it to feel like a struggle. I could choose for it to feel at the whim of something or someone else. Or I could choose to define that for myself. And every moment since then, I’ve done as such. Even now, I think because I also experience that deep level of pain and dissatisfaction.
I never want anyone to have to go as far as to feel that way. I also understand how gut wrenching and how disempowering it can feel to feel stuck. And I also know that that’s not the reality. That’s also why I focus on mindset and nervous system regulation of like, you just have to hold on and you also have to be able to see what’s possible.
Chris: that’s incredibly. Mm-hmm. Impactful and, and heavy, Kelle, and thank you for sharing that with us. There’s your superhero origin story in a way, I’m a father of daughters, it impacts me pretty hard as you say that, right? ’cause I think about my 11-year-old and I think about, one of the things that I try to focus on as a parent is to try to give her the feeling of support and the right to follow her own path. Right. And of course I want the best for her, but I want her best for her, not my version of the best for her.
And, you know, that wasn’t necessarily granted me as a kid, but then when I hear that for you, it’s such a young moment. I wonder, did you feel that there was a you know, an ordained path, and then you kind of awoke to the possibility of that, oh, this is my path.
Kelle: Yeah. And also you know, hindsight’s 2020, and as I, I see what I do now, and I look at these moments where I’ve, chosen different paths, right? I came back, I was like, it doesn’t have to be this, it could be anything. Like anything is possible. Anything is possible. You can do anything like honey, you didn’t like that then go somewhere else, like you have free will and like there’s so much power in that. But that’s not something that I think we all recognize as a society, but more importantly, we don’t even recognize within ourselves. Right? It’s like, but I have this corporate job, I have this list. I’ve done all the things.
Right? And I mean, it will go to even my second iteration of, you know, leaving Lauder. It’s like I looked down, I had a masters. I have four patents. I’ve launched two brands. I, I opened up a whole lab in Shanghai and, you know, I’ve like done all of the things and I’ve like checked these boxes. I’m like, whose list is this?
You know, and so I just think that there’s also, I do believe in the woowoo a little bit too. I, I recently gave a talk about this invisible symphony and how everything is connected. And I think this is something that michael Singer and his book, The Untethered Soul, speaks about how there’s so much there’s this like natural symphony in the world, Birds know to fly south in the winter, like the, the leaves of trees fall and it, it, it fertilizes the ground for what’s gonna rise next and the sun rises in its sets. There’s this natural order and even the perfection of events that have to occur for you to even exist. And then as humans, we think like nothing happens unless we do it.
But what I realized is there is this divine symphony, like the same way. That, a bee thinks that it’s just doing his little job, getting like nectar from that little flower. Little does he know that he’s pollinating an entire field of lavender. And I think that there is a very unique note. There’s a purpose.
There’s something that we all have. And sometimes when we get convoluted with the shoulds and the expectations, and sometimes when our nervous system is dysregulated and we can’t tap into our intuition. We lose our special note. Mm-hmm. And so a lot of I what I think people are waking up to now and like, okay, I am doing this feeling, this discomfort, feeling stress, nervous systems out of regulation.
This pull between what I’m supposed to do, but what I know that there’s something more, but maybe not even having the clarity of what that is. I feel in my hearts of hearts that that’s the awakening to what their unique purpose is. And when you are in alignment with that, the way that things naturally start to flow, the way that you expand beyond the things that you have expected for yourself, or what’s even possible.
I have witnessed it myself in many iterations of my life. When I’ve leaned into those things, like I never thought I’d, own an online art gallery at like 18 or do a national tele. I’ve never, except I do a million other things that I’ve done in my life, but it’s my ability to be able to tap into that intuition, to have that deep connection, to allow the space for those things to rise.
My ability to release some of the old beliefs, or even like the old frameworks that I had to, squeeze myself into and to embody what’s possible. That made so much possible and so much more, and I see it for myself and the hundreds of people I’ve worked with within my programs.
Todd: Yeah, I gotta say, ’cause we’ve been friends for a while and I didn’t know that story, so I, I just want to chime in and say I’m deeply moved that you shared that.
And it does make sense actually knowing you because your ability to redirect is so inspiring. And actually when you were sharing, like you could do anything, like, just when you went into that, I just started to feel like the cloud rise from me, you know? And I consider myself someone that’s a little bit like you, that’s constantly not that attached and reinventing all the time and, and doing, but even here, I was just like, oh my God, I’m still so limited.
There’s still so many ways that I’m not seeing the possibility. And I think that transmission of what you just did is why we tune into episodes like this is to understand. I also think that, you know you’re really modeling something, for us as well. And I want to talk a little bit about the nervous system and I want to get into what you actually do, right?
Because I know it’s, also tactical, right? I, I love woo as well, but it’s also tactical here. And I think what you said is so relevant and why Chris and I started this podcast I say this to Chris all the time, like, I love speed and not the drug. I love speed in terms of helping people make a transition or a transformation faster than they would’ve if they hadn’t met me or met us or whatever.
Okay. And that means that they don’t have to go fully down negative, terrible rabbit holes. You went all the way down at a young age, like to really experience what sounds like almost like an NDE, you know, like a near death experience, to then come back and have that moment of like, oh my God, this life is short.
Let me go for it. Which now you’re sharing. And so I think our goal is to help people get there without having to go down these really tough, challenging rabbit holes, right? That’s what we’re doing. And your path now has been around helping people with nervous system regulation. Why? Why nervous system?
Like why is that the thing for you? Like for me, it’s a lot about clarity and we could talk about that another time, but for you, it’s nervous system. And I want to get into why is that your choice? Why is that a lever that you believe is so powerful for people to make this transition?
Kelle: Yeah, that’s part of it, the nervous system.
So I created what’s called the embodiment method, and there are actually three components to it. The first is release, I am a master hypnotherapist, and I work a lot within the subconscious. When I share the story about how everything shifted, nothing in my world had shifted, right?
Like the same things that were stressed, the same struggles, all of those things were there. Everything that had shifted was my mindset, how I saw those things, how I saw myself, my identity. It was at a deep subconscious level. I had shifted how I saw the world and what was possible. Certain blinders had come up, certain beliefs that I had about how the world worked and what was limited to me had subsided.
And so the first pillar of it is the release. You know, I almost liken it to, like when a spaceship takes off, to leave this atmosphere. Yes, you have the launch, engines that are on it that propel it out of this stratosphere. But when it gets into a whole new stratosphere, a whole new atmosphere.
It has to release it. Right? And there are certain things, there are certain beliefs, there are certain concepts, there are certain ways we see the world, certain identities that we’ve held that kept us safe, that may have gotten us here. But as we talk about elevating to our next level, changing stratospheres, going into new atmospheres going into new territory, it oftentimes requires the release.
And that release happens within the subconscious. I really use a lot of neuroscience to help people identify what are the beliefs that might keep their blinders on, or keep them thinking that it has to be this way, right? Because the moment those blew off for me. Everything became possible,
Todd: What kind of tools are you talking about here?
Kelle: So some of it’s through exploration there are some key beliefs and frameworks and fears and emotions you’re not just stuck because you have like this one thing of fear of success.
It’s like a, a yarn ball with all these different threats and emotions. And so I use subconscious activation, which is a combination of neurolinguistic programming and hypnosis. To really allow you to get into a theta state where you’re able to identify and connect with those old beliefs, those old identities, and release them to heal them and to rewire and to fully embody at a deep subconscious level, the new identities, the new beliefs, the new possibilities that you wanna hold that are more congruent with where you’re going. So that’s the first part, this idea of releasing.
Todd: Yeah. And I just wanna chime in on that before we jump in because it’s really resonant to the work that we’re doing in reinvention.
I mean, we call it allow and reflect, which is I think what a lot of people don’t honor, that there needs to be some level of letting go. Of allowing these repressed emotions, you know, like these, these things that we’ve squashed down to be able to be processed, to be able to come out and to be processed.
So you dropped a lot of buzzwords right there that are very familiar to me, right? Getting into a theta brainwave state. You know, I’ve done a lot of theta healing work, you know, so getting into a brainwave state that’s a little bit lower than we’re in right now, you know, to allow that information to come through using hypnosis techniques that, you know, you’re obviously a master at, and audio technologies.
It sounds like you’re doing a little bit of that, and we’ll share some of the stuff, you know from our episode below we’ll share links to Kelle’s website and stuff, if you’re interested. And maybe there’s some free downloads or information that you have around your stuff, because I know that spending some time allowing yourself to release, and just let it go is the foundation for what’s next, right?
That’s why you have a process and a system here. So I just wanna honor that that’s really beautiful and also kind of really part of what we’re doing as well.
Kelle: Yeah. Yeah. honestly, the moment you. You know, our filters of how we see the world and what creates our internal representation is very much based on our beliefs, decisions that we’ve made, memories that we’ve had, our values and identities that we hold of ourselves.
If we’re experiencing the world in this limited way, we have to start looking at those filters. And the moment you start clearing some of those filters, you start to expand your perception of what you experience in the world. And so some people are like, oh my God, it’s like magic. All this stuff happened.
I’m like, honey, it’s always been there. We take in something like 52 million bits of information through our five senses, yet we’re only consciously aware of 126. And what’s getting deleted, generalized, distorted are based on those filters. So the moment you start to ease up and expand those filters, release some of those filters, you start to experience more of what’s already there.
So it’s not really magic, it’s neuroscience.
And then what happens though is when people start doing this and like, oh, this is possible, but then it’s like, oh shit, this is possible. Mm-hmm. And if you have a nervous system, like, you know, our, our nervous system. It feels safest within our comfort zone.
But everything that you desire that you don’t currently have resides outside of your comfort zone. I always say joke around. I’m like, be careful what? Like before people come in my program. Like be careful what you wish for, what you manifest. ’cause you’re gonna get it. Think it’s in Gay Hendrick’s book, the Big Leap where he coined the upper limit and he talks about how, people are like, I want a million dollars, and they win the lottery and they get everything they desire, and then three years later they’re back to broke because they never knew how to manage that amount of money.
Right. I, I like to say they didn’t have the nervous system to hold it. Mm-hmm. So part of the embodiment method is embody, right. Giving people the tools to expand their capacity to hold things. You know, I have a lot of clients that, as they step into these new identities and what they’re calling in.
Many of them through this journey, just naturally, it’s not a prerequisite, but some people decide to stop drinking and they just really wanna be present and they, they really start to wanna honor their body in different ways. And what’s really fascinating is, you know, I hear, it’s not that I, I wanna drink or I feel I need to numb after a bad day, but I notice it’s the good things. It’s like I have a great day and I feel all this energy and it’s like too much. And I’m like, yeah, this is why you have to even expand your capacity to hold the good.
Todd: Isn’t that interesting? I found that so much as well that people can’t hold when things start going well, they tend to get to like these distracted behaviors and these numbing behaviors and they don’t know why it’s confusing ’cause things are now going well.
Yeah. Is this the second step? So the first step was around
Kelle: it’s the release .
Todd: And the second is
Kelle: Embody. And this is where we get to the nervous system regulation. Okay. And this is where I incorporate one of the most profound technologies that have truly changed my life has been Kundalini yoga, breath work, and meditation and it, I mean, I love it because there are things that you can articulate like I have a fear of failure.
Maybe you can even say, I have a fear of success, but there’s so much that lives in our body that lives within our nervous system, and it’s one of these technologies that truly works at one releasing, right. If you’ve ever had acupuncture or acupressure before, you know, traditional Chinese medicine, it’s understood that you have meridians that run through your body, and any mental, emotional, or physical ailment is a block of flow of bad energy.
So in acupuncture, they use needles to stimulate a meridian endpoint within Kundalini, I’m not like poking people, but we use your body and angles and breath to move this energy. So you’re releasing and at the same time. Just like as you exercise to grow a muscle, right? You work the muscle. We do these exercise that put controlled pressure on our nervous system that allows it to strengthen and expand.
And the reason the embodiment method combines these things because as your perception through your subconscious work starts to expand, you need to have the nervous system that supports it to hold what it is that you’re, you’re calling in and to hold this expanded and elevated identity that you’re calling in because it’s not just a straight line, right?
Like even in the, the transitions that I made, there’s always this in-between. I call myself a transitional doula, like helping people through the process of birthing their next chapter because there’s a part where it is kind of tight. Like things start to shift, but you need to have the nervous system to keep you steady through that.
Todd: This is why we called you in. I wanted you to come on here because Chris and I talk a lot about tactics and game plan, I mean like good stuff, really good stuff. But like in my own journey, it’s been a lot of what you’re talking about. You know, like a lot of deep exploration into like the physicality and like that’s why reinvention where you’re going through a career transition, especially when you’re kind of mid-career and you’re used to a certain trajectory the future seems uncertain and scary, right? And yes, you do need to do things in the real world, like people have bills to pay, and some people in our community have kids in college that they need to worry about. But this is a moment in time to stop and get rerouted into the idea that you need to look at your old identity and you need to start creating your new one as you’re gonna reinvent it.
All of us are gonna go through this right now. I just think culturally speaking, with everything that’s going on in the world. We are at the precipice of massive changes just like really, really big changes. So this what we’re talking about is important. This is the deeper personal work that’s part of reinvention.
Looking at what Kelle talking about here and saying, all right. How am I gonna start to release? How am I gonna start to embody my new self? How am I gonna use breath work? I can tell you that breath work practices for me, Kelle, and we might have talked about this in the past, man, like I’ve done holotropic, I’ve done a lot of breath work in the past just using your own breath it’s unbelievable the states that you get access to. Like it’s actually pretty insane. And just using your own breathing. I love that embodiment is a piece of it. And you use Kundalini yoga, which is a particular type of yoga. Yes.
Kelle: Yeah. Yeah, a hundred percent. And then the last part of this is rise, right?
Like when you have cleared these and release these subconscious blocks, those old limiting identities, the fears, those emotions that, that keep us stuck, those old narratives. And you’ve regulated your nervous system and expanded your capacity, you give space to rise what’s really here for you? Mm. And you know what’s really fascinating is, I’m in wellness now. I run and operate ASRI Wellness. We have the Visionary Leadership Lab, we have programs and all of these things. I was one of the youngest executives at Estée Lauder and what’s really fascinating because I think that there’s this idea that, I can’t be both. I can’t have my nervous system expanded, be grounded in this identity of expansion and like be in a corporate world.
That’s not true. I actually went to a luncheon for Leonard Lauder the other day and I saw it was, a lot of my old colleagues, I, some my biggest clients are corporations. There is a place for it and even i’m working with the same people I did, in the rat race, but in a very different capacity.
One where I feel like my value is even greater in how I contribute to these companies, and that feels more aligned. But I had to come to that own alignment with myself and to work through that, to even get to a place where I can even imagine having this type of role and contributing in this kind of way.
So that’s to say that even if you are within a corporation, even if you are in the nine to five, I’m not saying quit it all and go to the jungle and like do ayahuasca all day and find yourself, there’s a way for you to find yourself and to feel really grounded and still make an impact. But the space of which you’re doing it from and the clarity with which you’re doing it from, and the expansive perspective of what you’re doing it from will allow you to do it with greater impact.
Chris: I have to jump in because Kelle, so much of what you’re saying is resonating with me because I was in corporate for 20 years and I never really felt like it was really aligned. The work that I was doing really wasn’t aligning well with me. And I actually had that idea of the dichotomy, like, to say, well, what I wanna do can’t exist and can’t coexist with corporate.
I even have told, sort of jokingly to Todd, , I’m a musician, so it was like, I’d be like, bring my guitar to the office ’cause I was gonna go play music after work and I’d like hide the guitar from people ‘ God forbid they saw I had a creative side.
I was very like rigid in my definition of what is a corporate persona versus what is a not corporate persona. Too rigid. What I’m hearing from you is really this idea of there’s like a whole integration that’s possible for you as a human being. And it doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to blow up all of the sort of, you know, if you, if you wanna live in this corporate environment, if this is what works for you from a career standpoint, then it’s just a matter of are you bringing your whole self into this life that you’re living?
And is it integrated into that such that you’re not resisting, or suppressing a part of yourself or whatever it is, and I’m sure you can, more eloquently put that than me, but does that sort of resonate with some of what you’re doing with people?
Kelle: Yeah, and I’ll give you an example.
I’ll be honest. Most of the women in the Visionary leadership Lab are working within corporate jobs. And, but I’ll give you an example of just of myself. I was at Estée Lauder for 10 years. I started in global product development for MAC Cosmetics, one of the brands within the corporate umbrella, and I did corporate innovation. I leaned into this work, but one of the things based on my past experiences that again is a superpower of like really staying true and leaning into what feels and excites me and at that time I was very excited about millennials and social media and what was happening in the digital space and how it was changing, how we’re talking and how it was so different than what many of our brands were doing.
I just leaned into it and I like anything I could read about it, I would read about it. Any conference I could go to, I was talking to every tech company and I actually, I was so excited about it. I remember I created this presentation called like, welcome to tomorrow and like about like how millennials are gonna revolutionize our business.
And I just booked a conference room and invited every senior executive everyone’s like, who’s meeting is this? I think she did it herself. And everyone’s like, okay, so can you focus on this? And I became lead of millennial innovation for the Estée Lauder companies where my job was bringing in companies like Snapchat, at the time was called Musically.
Now it’s TikTok and, it was my passion. I think back I listened to my gut. I listened to that intuition. I had a nervous system that can like, okay, I get it. You don’t get this right now. But it feels really steady in me. Mm-hmm. I have the space for that vision of what I saw as possible to rise.
And I’d already done the work of clearing the fear as I know anything is possible and I help people to release, to really step into. And I was able to do that in a corporate setting and make a massive impact in the company, do a job that had never even been thought about before.
But it was so aligned with everything that I was, and still am at the time, and, and integrated perfectly well.
Chris: I want people to hear that Kelle, what I’m hearing, if I can restate it is, you were so able to allow yourself to just be open and attuned to what you were feeling and what was pulling you and drawing you that in a way it’s almost like when an artist talks about being a channel for the art and it comes through them, it’s like you were open and ready in a way for like a new concept that maybe even you at the beginning couldn’t have said it in words exactly what it was, but you were able to follow it and then create this thing or channel this thing that was brand new.
And I think the people that we, Todd and I work with, I think that’s a lot of what we’re trying to help people get to is the idea of it’s okay that you can’t say in two pithy sentences what the outcome is going to be. That’s not the way this process works. Like it’s a process pull the threads and follow the flow and like it will reveal itself. You will reveal yourself.
Kelle: This is where nervous system regulation comes in because it’s, everything in your system is fight or flight what the uncertainty. I can’t. And this is why I think some people love the embodiment method because it’s this clear pathway to towards that where this is what we’re allowing the space to open, to rise to.
This, I think, is a spiritual aspect. I say it like a more spirit meets strategy where you’re giving this space for that intuition to come in and to come through. You’re calibrating your nervous system to be okay, it’s like, you know the baby’s gonna be born, you just gotta breathe. It’s, it’s gonna happen, right?
Todd: I have a question for you you have like such a natural orientation to being fearless and courageous in whatever environment you’re gonna be. Right? And I think it’s very inspiring. So one of the things that I get asked a lot is around, well, how do we deal with disappointment along the way when we’re in a process of reinvention?
It can be exciting and then you try something and it doesn’t work, right? And then, and then oh my God, it didn’t work. I need to go back to X, Y, Z. This is just like where the rubber meets the road for a lot of people. A lot of people have this idea of like, oh my God, like the career’s blown up.
I need to like land in the next thing if that next one thing is, isn’t it? There’s a lot of fear that, oh well now I need to retreat and go back and that actually starts the process all over again. I’m curious, like in your experience of working with a lot of these corporate folks and doing this deeper embodiment work, how do you help them ground in the intrinsic mindset that it’s always changing, there is gonna be disappointment along the way.
You don’t just like hear, talk like this and then you’re off to the races and everything, you’re living on a yacht in Saint-Tropez and you’re making millions of dollars doing what you love. Like there’s a process here, how do you help people just along the roller coaster ride of this process?
Kelle: Honestly, this is why I don’t think any of these things could just be used in isolation. Like you can’t just expand your nervous system and like have downloads and be like out there all willy-nilly right? the mindset does play a really big part of this. I think about when, I was younger and learning to ski.
If someone tells you, like as an adult, oh my God, you’re learning to ski now, it’s impossible. You’re gonna fall, like watch out it’s just really hard to pick up and every time you fall, you’re gonna break something, you know? And then you get off the lift and you start to ski and you fall.
You’re like, oh, see, it’s, I’m gonna fall and like it’s true. It’s too hard to pick up. Versus if you talk on the phone like, oh my god, kids can do this. Like, it’s so easy. You fall a few times, but like, you’ll get up and it’ll be fine. You know, you go, you fall and like, oh, I fell, but I know I’m gonna get up.
Right? Like you spiral up. And so much of our ability to spiral up or spiral down has to do with those core beliefs. I’ll give you an example that is very public. I went on America’s Next Top model really thinking that like, you know, as I said, I was bred to believe I was gonna be CFO of a Fortune 500 company.
Never a model. Like I would ask my mom like, do you think I’m pretty? And she’d tell me, you know, pretty girls are a dime a dozen. Like you’d pass in a crowd. You know, like focus on like who you are. That’s the most important thing in what you know. I had my own little filters about appearance and stuff, but there’s literally an episode on America’s Next Top model called Girl that Cries in the Mirror, and it’s about me crying at the site of my own reflection.
Now there’s a lot of context around that, which we could save for another day, but needless to say, I didn’t do well on that show, and it was. around the world, everyone knows that I did not do well on that show. And as I left after like week of and week of like humiliation and just like failing and just not getting it, I was 19 when I did the show, you know, I’m leaving like, how do you feel, Kelle?
Like, you, you really blew it. And I’m like, well, you know what, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. And it’s just remained a core belief of mine that life is always happening for you, not to you. And I’ve seen too many times where and I, I invite anyone to think about this, something that has happened that has felt so devastating that you thought has been the worst thing in the world, that has actually been the catalyst for some of your greatest growth in progress And having had too many moments in life that prove that it’s like, and maybe this is just something that comes with age of like, oh, okay. I guess is where the nervous system comes in. You just know I’m like, it all works out in the end. If it hasn’t worked out, it’s just not the end. And so how can you hold that steadiness?
How can you have a core belief that it will, it will happen? I was watching this interview with Ed Sheeran and he was like,, everyone thinks artists are just like gifted and they’re born with it. He’s like, let me play a video, like a tape of me for you of when I first started, and he sounded awful.
He could barely play the guitar. He could barely sing. We all start somewhere, but it’s our ability to make a decision and our really deep, deep belief in knowing that if this is something that feels aligned, that it’s all gonna work out right? I think about when I’ve redecorated, there’s sometimes the moment where you have to like move all the furniture and everything, like looks crazy and you’re like, why did I do this?
If you stop the redecoration process when everything’s a mess, like of course life looks a mess. But if you allow yourself to go through it, eventually things start to come together and back into place the way they should. Mm-hmm. But it’s what is the belief? What are you telling yourself? to get yourself through it and , again, you have the nervous system to support you to the other side because it all works out the end.
Chris: That is so powerful. I I love the Ed Sheeran example. I wanted to say I had the same experience on America’s Next Top Model, Kelle. That happened to me there too. Oh, really? Um, yeah. I didn’t know that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Kelle: it’s a meme now. So embarrassing.
Chris: But it is, it’s an amazing thing though, because I actually did not know that story, Kelle and it, the funny thing is, is that while you’re talking, this whole conversation, I’m like, this woman is amazing. These are such amazing things but then that’s a pretty formative moment to have a really difficult public time. Right but like now it’s just part of your story. And, and I think that that’s what’s so cool, again for the people we talk to in a reinvention community is just this idea of the people who end up doing it are the ones who did it.
It’s this idea of there’s a million people who could be doing the thing that you wanna do or that you project out that you want to try to do. And the ones who are successful, the ones who just kept doing it, and like you said around alignment, Kelle, it’s like becoming inevitable in a sense of like, I feel this and I’m going towards it, whatever that means.
Mm-hmm. Whatever that’s through.
Kelle: Yeah. And you know, I think sometimes, like I said, life is always working for you. It’s not happening to you. So even with Top Model, you know, the reason I went on the show is because this was before like Facebook or Instagram, and I’m like, how is anyone gonna know about my art gallery?
And I’m like, I secretly also want it to model. So I auditioned thinking this would be a great way to promote my gallery by being on a TV show. And I could secretly like live out my fantasy of being a model. That didn’t work out. But what did happen at the end of the show, like Janice Dickinson is like, why is she here?
Like, what does she do? And Tyra’s like, well, she owns an art gallery. And they’re like, well, she should go back to that. And what was interesting, I think having that breakdown moment of crying on national television and being so clear that I wasn’t a model, no one cared about me as a model. Everyone was like, how did you own an art gallery so young?
What is art, like tell us about it? And that path became clear. So what felt like the failure of one path was actually the momentum of a path that was clearly more aligned for me. And if I had just kind of like sunken to the failure that was and didn’t realize like everything is ultimately happening for me.
Maybe very publicly, very painfully, but nonetheless, it was what catapulted, you know? That’s why I say everything works out. Maybe that’s something that just only happens with age, but. I’m here to tell, you don’t have to get old to know this. You, you can know this now.
Todd: I wanna start with just like summarizing so grateful that you’re here with us and giving us such, such gems right now.
You’ve literally taken me to a different place in my own life. Seriously. Like just in this conversation. So thank you for that. what I’m hearing is like your core work is infusing these core beliefs really deep down that like you can do this. That this life is short, that it’s making a choice.
Like for people that are reinventing, it’s like making a choice to look at it with optimism and opportunity as opposed to fear and doubt. And so your work is a lot about like using every tool that, you know, like using real, affirmative stuff. Audios, physical embodiment stuff like everything to rewire that nervous system.
So that way it’s literally humming at the vibration of my life is short, everything’s possible. Yeah. It doesn’t mean that you’re not gonna go on a little bit of a rollercoaster ride. There’s gonna be things that aren’t always gonna work out. You’re gonna maybe look bad at times. You know, maybe you’re gonna feel embarrassed or shameful like, like you’re not saying here, you didn’t come on here and be like, oh, it’s all perfect when you do this.
No. The real testament to reinvention is how quickly did you get back up on that horse and keep going and you embody something very unique. Even when you’re sad or going through it, you still have that, engine running, that, that narrative running of like, no, no, I’m gonna keep going.
Like, whatever kills me is gonna make me stronger. And I think that’s what you’re here to share is that core programming piece that will allow people to then flourish in their lives. Does that summarize it or am I, am I,
Kelle: yeah, and I, and I definitely have bad days, but I’m not fighting against something.
I think why things feel so challenging sometimes it’s, change feels like a uphill battle and it’s because I know I want this, but I have a nervous system, a belief system that doesn’t say it’s possible. And it’s where it requires so much willpower to change and we get knocked down. This is why, you know, I even went back to school to study neuroscience to help how do we at a deep neurological level, deep, subconscious level help this to become the new software that you run on and having a nervous system that supports it. I will say I’ve had. People in my community that came in that couldn’t ask for a raise. A professor was afraid to ask for a raise. One, she’s now tenured and now she’s like emailing with Oprah and, you know, just the confidence that can shift so it’s no longer I have to like, you know, affirmations and like, I think I can, I think I can, but a system that doesn’t believe it. How do you create a system that knows it and then a system that allows you to take the actions that are in alignment with it.
Todd: Boom, like mic drop. That is so good. You’ve got me so fired up. You’ve really got me fired up. So glad that we did this. I’ve worked with Kelle. We’ve masterminded it, we’ve done some stuff together, but I didn’t know all this so enlightening. I feel even closer to you as a human, you know? And as a person. And I’m really grateful that you’re here and we’re gonna drop links in all the areas that we can to send people over to your work. I know you mostly work with women, is that right? Like, do you also work with men or you just, you threw us aside. I mean, what’s going on?
Kelle: I, I do mostly work with women, But that may change in the future. We don’t know. But for right now, the Visionary Leadership Lab, it’s for, for women through this journey.
’cause there are some things that I think women in particular navigate and this program really helps, like this need to perform, self-worth, like how much of it is based on what we put out externally. There are some core things that, that women have to work through. And I think also some power that women have that I like to give them the space to expand and explore on.
Chris: Well, all the more reason. I’m so glad that you spoke to us today, Kelle, because I feel like I got like a secret little stash of something that I otherwise couldn’t have gotten. So thank you so much for
Kelle: You’re welcome.
Chris: sharing so generously and, and like really deep and helpful stuff.
Todd: Yeah, you’re true gift, you’re true light on this planet.
Like I’m just grateful to, to know you and we’re gonna share this far and wide. So thank you again, Kelle, and we’ll see you soon.
Kelle: My pleasure. Thank you guys.
